August 17, 2002
MOONED BY GOD
The evening of the 14th of August, I decided to go to the shores of the Great Spirit Wilderness by boat. About halfway there, the sky became angry. A strong wind emerged suddenly from the south and the waves began to toss the boat. The water had turned a strange shade of bilious green as white caps formed. I rounded Princess Point and got out of the boat, leaving it stranded on the sand about thirty feet off shore. By the time the tempest had passed, the waves had pushed the boat into the shallows at the water's edge.
With great effort and with the help of the lifting effect of incoming waves I was finally able to push the boat back out to water deep enough to allow me to start the engine. As I headed back toward the west, the waters appeared dark with silvery casts. The sun had hidden itself behind the ancient forest of the Wilderness Cathedral which made the trees appear opaque. Bright rays of white light flashed in divergent directions from behind black and gray clouds.
Twin rainsqualls blackened the horizon to the northwest as a line of pink emerged along the horizon. There I was, the only boat on the huge lake as far as the eye could see. Just God and me. We were sort of communing together and I thanked Him for putting on such a wonderful display of His artistic talents as well as His awesome power and I remembered the time that He had come to me in a cloud and ordered me to go into debt to purchase The Wilderness Cathedral from Mr. Hurwitz, the man who had been destroying the last of His ancient redwood forests.
I remembered how my friend Debbie would always argue with me and refuse to accept the fact that I had seen the face of God and how in the Bible it says that even Moses only got to see His "Hinder Parts." I was actually not exactly too excited about the prospect of seeing God's "Hinder Parts" and God, my trickster friend, knew it, so at that very instant GOD MOONED ME, and I have the photos to prove it!!!
I started laughing so hard that I almost fell out of the boat. When I gathered my wits, I grabbed my camera, and was able to take a couple of snaps before He "put his pants back on." Still almost crying from laughing so hard, I said, "God, you may hate me for this and of course you can toss me off this boat and drown me if you wish, but just for that I am going to moon you back!"
Standing up in the boat, I turned my back on God's "Hinder Parts," dropped my drawers and mooned Him back and said "Kill me now if you can't take a joke." I wasn't the least bit worried 'cause God and I
have gotten to be pretty good buddies these last few years.
I said, while still laughing, "Give me a sign that you aren't mad at me." I looked to my right and in that very instant a beautiful rainbow began to form as the western sky turned to brilliant gold. Then turning
to the right I saw that God's "Hinder Parts" had turned from pinkish (about the same color as mine) to an intense shade of gold as well.
By this time the rainbow had started forming the other side of its arch and God went back to work with His marvelous paintbrush, joining the two ends of the rainbow and creating masterpiece after masterpiece right before my eyes. The battery on my camera was almost dead and so I was unable to capture the entire sequence but did manage to take enough shots to give you some idea. Finally He placed a golden crown with halo over the dark forest of The Wilderness Cathedral and as I pulled into shore for the night He intensified the brilliance of the rainbow's end over The Great Spirit Wilderness. WOW!!!
P.S. While relating this past week's Cathedral Tales, God has been amusing me with wonderful animal as well as human-like faces in the clouds while a flock of crows has been gobbling up my leftover breakfast cereal.
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